It becomes an obsession

The Self is a bit of an obsession of mine just now. How to put into words what I experience when being it?

See, when I had first moved to Holland about 9 years ago, I sat in meditation for the first time. Before I would just go in and out of the body without noticing it much. I would have conversations with higher beings, beings in other dimensions ceaselessly, half aware most of the time. When I consciously sat down on that Monday evening to follow a guided meditation, all hell broke free in me. Or rather, all light, laughter, joy. It was so big, so loud, an enormous explosion of sounds and golden sparkles. And still it happened in a body that did not stir a nerve or muscle on the outside. As I came out of it, I had lost access to my brain. Again, hard to put into words. Except that everything that seemed to confine the world, separate the moments and experiences, was gone. It seemed unaccessible, or like an empty room. I could feel, finally, really feel my heart, or just feel. I felt HERE. No body, just being here and free and without worry. This never fully left me. It became the ability to sit deeply inside myself, while the world can go mad around me. From that place the journey goes on, it is not the end, the holy grail. It only just begins from there. The hunger to know more, to remember all, and to bring it down here into this life. To realize the Self, I guess.

So, the Self. I experience it as a vast space, a space of light. It is always here, just beneath the surface of this physical, connected light, holding it up, but clearly autarch from it to. It can be without the body. The body not without it. My mind cannot fathom this space, because it has no end or shape. It constantly morphs. This again I just say to ease my mind, while I am writing this. When in it, there are no words needed. It is ISNESS, I assume.

Why does this Self matter to someone who is here to clear data, to support others to heal their wounds? Because when in this space, it is clear as day, that all wounding is transforming unless we stop it. Again, ALL WOUNDING IS TRANSFORMING UNLESS WE STOP IT. How? Through our thoughts. deep, deep unconscious thought and more conscious thought along the lines of: I don’t deserve.

Sitting in this higher Self is not ABSTRACT. THAT is my main concern. To meet Your Self every day, is the ultimate healing pill. It’s your gas station and flower park in one. And the ultimate prevention method for further or new ailment and blockage. Questions? lillian.fellmann@gmail.com

Practice clearing shadow or wounding, densities and blockages.

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